Are You Sabotaging Your Joy?

Psychology Today
by Lybi Ma
February 20, 2026
AI-Generated Deep Dive Summary
Embracing both joy and suffering is essential for living a full life, as highlighted in the article "Are You Sabotaging Your Joy?" This piece explores how experiencing negative emotions can actually enhance our appreciation of positive moments. The author reflects on personal experiences of great happiness and profound sorrow, emphasizing that avoiding pain only diminishes our ability to fully enjoy life's joys. The concept of fluid thinking is introduced as a key strategy for managing life's emotional ups and downs. Fluid thinkers are flexible and accepting, allowing them to navigate challenges without getting stuck in despair or overly focused on achieving constant positivity. The article uses the example of a neighbor who turned a job interview rejection into a learning opportunity, demonstrating how embracing setbacks can lead to growth. Emotional balance is crucial across all areas of life, from relationships to work. Relationships often bring mixed feelings—love and pain coexist, requiring us to find calm amidst emotional turbulence. The article suggests focusing on peace rather than chasing either positive or negative emotions. By understanding the root causes of our emotions and embracing all experiences, we can achieve a balanced mental state. Ultimately, accepting both joy and suffering is vital for true fulfillment and mental health. This approach allows us to navigate life's challenges with resilience and appreciation, enriching our overall well-being.
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Originally published on Psychology Today on 2/20/2026