How to Heal Without Closure
Psychology Today
by Sharon Martin, DSW, LCSWFebruary 14, 2026
AI-Generated Deep Dive Summary
Healing from an emotionally abusive relationship without closure can feel impossible, but it’s a journey that many of us must navigate. When the person who hurt you refuses to take responsibility or provide answers, it’s natural to crave closure—whether through an apology, explanation, or acknowledgment. However, this process doesn’t have to depend on their participation. Instead, healing involves reclaiming your power and finding peace within yourself.
The article explains that emotionally abusive individuals often lack the empathy or willingness to acknowledge their harm, leaving survivors feeling stuck in a cycle of disappointment and confusion. The hope for closure can keep you tethered to the relationship long after it ends. To move forward, it’s essential to release the expectation that someone else will validate your experience. Healing is an internal process where you take charge of your own truth and stop waiting for external validation.
One key takeaway is the importance of creating your own closure. This means accepting your experience as real and significant, even without acknowledgment from the other person. It’s a journey of self-validation and grief that allows you to let go of the need for an apology or explanation. Journaling can be a powerful tool in this process, helping you process emotions, set boundaries, and track your growth.
Another crucial step is naming what actually happened. Emotionally abusive relationships often blur reality, leaving survivors questioning their own experiences. By focusing on how you were impacted—what behaviors harmed you and how they affected your sense of safety, self-worth, or trust—you can reclaim clarity and focus on your truth rather than seeking answers from the abuser.
Finally, it’s important to separate understanding from acceptance. You may never fully understand why the person behaved the way they did, but closure doesn’t require that understanding. It requires accepting that their behavior caused harm and that this harm is enough to justify moving forward. Letting go of the need to “figure them out” frees up emotional energy and allows you to focus on healing and self-respect.
For readers interested in health and mental well-being, this article offers valuable insights into navigating complex relationships and finding peace without external validation. The process may be challenging, but it’s a vital step toward reclaiming your power and moving forward on your own terms.
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Originally published on Psychology Today on 2/14/2026