No, Family Estrangement Is Not a “Trend”

Psychology Today

by Phil Lane MSW, LCSW

February 20, 2026

AI-Generated Deep Dive Summary

Family estrangement is not a “trend,” as suggested by some media outlets like Oprah Winfrey’s podcast, which has misleadingly framed the issue as something fashionable or passing. The use of terms like “trend” or “fad” is deeply problematic because it trivializes the intense emotional pain and complexity involved in cutting ties with family members. This framing not only disrespects those who have had to make such difficult decisions but also perpetuates harmful stereotypes about the nature of estrangement. For someone like the author, who has been estranged from their parent for a decade, the decision was far from impulsive or trendy. It came after years of trying to reconcile and failing to achieve a healthy relationship. Estrangement is often a last resort, taken only after exhausting all other options for healing and connection. The process is anything but easy—it involves ongoing grief, doubt, and the constant struggle to accept that reconciliation may never be possible. One critical myth to unpack is the idea that therapists encourage estrangement or push it as a solution. In reality, many therapists assume that clients want to work toward reconciliation, which can be harmful if that’s not the case. Therapists must adopt a non-assumptive approach, understanding that each individual’s family dynamics are unique and that the decision to go no contact is deeply personal. The framing of estrangement as a trend also undermines the autonomy of those who choose it. It implies that individuals are following a popular movement rather than making thoughtful, often painful choices for their own well-being. This perspective erases the complexity of their experiences and reduces something inherently human and emotional to a passing fad. Estrangement is not about status or social acceptance; it’s about survival and self-preservation. Ultimately, family estrangement is a profoundly difficult choice that reflects a person’s courage and commitment to their own healing and self-respect. It is not a trend but a deeply personal decision made in the face of emotional harm and unmet needs. For readers interested in mental health, understanding this nuanced reality is essential for fostering empathy and recognizing the validity of such choices.

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Originally published on Psychology Today on 2/20/2026