Therapy: It’s Not About Complaining, But Changing

Psychology Today
by Robert Taibbi L.C.S.W.
February 22, 2026
AI-Generated Deep Dive Summary
Therapy is often seen as a long-term solution for managing stress and improving daily life, but many people may not be fully utilizing its potential benefits. In the article "Therapy: It’s Not About Complaining, But Changing," the author highlights concerns about dependency and lack of progress in therapy. While therapy can provide short-term relief, the real value lies in creating meaningful change and developing new behaviors to address underlying issues. The article emphasizes that therapy should be a tool for growth, not just a space to vent frustrations. The author shares examples of couples like Sam and Cate, who have been in therapy for years but may not be making significant progress. This raises ethical questions about dependency, where individuals attend therapy out of habit rather than actively working toward specific goals. The article suggests that therapy should involve clear objectives, such as improving decision-making, enhancing relationships, or managing emotions more effectively. Setting these goals helps ensure that therapy sessions are focused and purposeful. To maximize the benefits of therapy, the author encourages individuals to take an active role in their treatment. This includes researching therapists whose approaches align with personal needs, preparing for sessions by identifying specific issues to address, and periodically reviewing progress with the therapist. By being proactive, clients can ensure they are receiving tailored support that meets their unique challenges. The article also stresses the importance of avoiding autopilot mode in therapy. If it feels like sessions have become repetitive or if therapy is being used as a substitute for other areas of life, such as seeking validation or support, this could hinder progress. Instead, clients should communicate openly with their therapist about any unmet needs or adjustments to the approach. Ultimately, therapy is most effective when it leads to tangible changes in how individuals think and act. By focusing on personal growth and goal achievement, therapy can empower individuals to overcome challenges and improve their overall well-being. This approach not only makes
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Originally published on Psychology Today on 2/22/2026